I am currently still on the lookout for teaching jobs or something that involves children. I have had a couple of prospects, but nothing permanate as of yet. I am hoping to line up a couple of interviews before we go on vacation.
I am so looking forward to going on vacation. I need a break from my house and my tenants. They are driving me nuts!! It's also really hard to work where you live.. but oh well.
I'm not quite sure what else I want to say.. I'm just stressed right now about future stuff and the unknown. I hate not knowing, but don't you go through most of your life not knowing.
I also am struggling with... how to put it.... not being challenged spiritually. Church is great, but I'm not getting a lot of meat there, it's milk. Which does help me learn the Bible better, but I also feel like I need to be ministering to people, or helping people out, or something. I just feel like there is this void inside of me that hasn't been filled since I left Brunswick. It might be because I'm not working in a profession that challenges me so my brain is not working as hard or because I'm not involved in something at church (except for Saturday night small group). I don't know. And it's hard to fill a void when you don't know exactly what they void is there for.
I'm also getting very short tempered with my husband, all the time. I feel like I am constantly getting angry or stressed about something little he said. I think that this is because we are around each other all day long and the only break we get from each other is the 4 hours that I go to work (if i go work that long) and during that time he is taking care of Jez. I feel like such a bad wife sometimes, because I talk before I think and it ends up in this huge argument that didn't need to happen in the first place. I like being selfish and getting things my way.. but i know that this is not how a marrage works. I am trying to work on realizing that my husband jokes all the time and he's hardly every serious about anything he says to me. Along with not being so stressed out all the time.
Anyways.. I better get to bed, it's late. Sorry for rambling. I appreciate prayers and loyal readers
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2 comments:
Wow, I'll definitely be praying for you. It's amazing the realizations that you have come to. I know you're not too fond of your job, but is there anyway to treat your job like your ministry? It seems like you need some sort of ministry (either inside or outside of church) to focus on. Just a couple thoughts. :) Hope today goes well for you.
Hey Emily~
I am sorry to hear that you are struggling...I hope we can get together when you get back. I see so many opportunities for you in ministry. Getting a new church up and reaching out to those that don't know God his hard.
You have had so many stressers on a new marriage in a short time. I will keep you in prayer.
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